World Cup Jokes

[squizzer86]

1. I can't believe we only managed a draw against a **** team that we should have so easily beaten. I am ashamed to call myself Algerian.

2. Knorr have released a special edition red and white striped Oxo cube to celebrate England's world cup campaign. It is called the laughing stock.

3. Why is Robert Green like ITV High Definition? They both switch off at the crucial moment.

4. My computer's been infected by the Robert Green virus. Now I can't save anything.

5. I went to the supermarket the other day to buy the Rob Green World Cup special edition condoms, they are extra slippery and you can't catch anything.

6. Wayne Rooney

[Adam]

mark, they are crap

[Kayleigh]

All of Englands future games have been moved to the Gay Adult channel because apparently the sight of 11 arseholes getting hammered isn't suitable for ITV and the BBC.

[Fast Eddy]

That's better Kayleigh. Well done. What site did you steal that from?

Eddy

[Kayleigh]

I got sent it by text, I had a few more but deleted them. I think Brian still has them though.

[Fast Eddy]

Good old Brian lol.

Eddy

[Andy]

The england goal keeping position is liek an STD......It started off as Seamen but now its all green

John Terry said: "The whole defence is behind Rob Green." With hindsight, that's a good place to stand.

Why is Robert Green like ITV High Definition? They both switch off at the crucial moment.

These Rob Green jokes are getting out of hand... In fact they're crossing the line

[Andy]

theres more lol .......


Wayne Rooney has been told he can take part in the later stages of the world cup, but only if he has a cortizone injection, apparently David Beckham overheard this and is demanding that if Rooney is getting a new car out of it he wants one as well

[Andy]

and just to be fair...one about my side of the border


The Scotland manager phones Sven to find out how to improve his training methods.

"Dustbins" says Sven, "Position dustbins around the training pitch and get your players to pass the ball between them, dribble round them, chip the ball over them, it'll improve all round ball control".

The next day Sven's phone rings, it's the Scottish manager, "Hi, The dustbin's are winning 3-1. What do I do now?"

[MrParker]

Ive heard too many that aint suitbale to be on her e:L

[pottsey]

Snow White
The seven dwarfs always left to go work in the mine
early each morning.


As always, Snow White stayed home doing her
domestic chores.



As lunchtime approached, she would prepare their
lunch and carry it to the mine.



One day as she arrived at the mine with the lunch, she saw
that there had been a terrible cave-in.

Tearfully, and fearing the worst, Snow White
began calling out, hoping against hope that the dwarfs had
somehow survived.
'Hello...Hello!' she shouted. 'Can anyone hear me?
Hello!'



For a long while, there was no answer. Losing
hope, Snow White again shouted, 'Hello! Is
anyone down there?'




Just as she was about to give up all hope, she
heard a faint voice from deep within the mine,
singing;
ENGLAND FOR THE WORLD CUP
Snow White fell to her knees and prayed,
'Oh, thank you, God! At least Dopey is still alive.

[Andy]

and the best world cup joke of all time....































ENGLAND lol

what a game that was ;)

[MrParker]

1. The Ref
2. The Linesman
3. Sepp Blatter (Fifa President)

[Andy]

1. The Ref
2. The Linesman
3. Sepp Blatter (Fifa President)

ok so lets say that goal had been allowed......u still wouldnt have won coz ur sh1t lol

[Chr15]

we were there...

nearest scotland got to south africa was the holiday brochure :P

[Andy]

we were there...

nearest scotland got to south africa was the holiday brochure :P

and now ur not lol

the difference is we know we are sh1t so never have high expectations :D

[Chr15]

lol fair enough

i always knew it wouldnt be easy when the group stage was drawn, of course our media thought otherwise

[Andy]

and heres proof that the england "goal" was not over the line!!

http://www.whoateallthepies.tv/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/QxJvh.jpg

[Chr15]

hahaha

[Andy]

and this has got to be a joke........Number 6 on the list

http://football.uk.msn.com/world-cup-2010/england/articles.aspx?cp-documentid=153915952

[Ross]

Two of my favourites, not hilarious but good :p

- people are comparing the world cup to the war. The French have made an early exit, the US come at the last minute and England are left to battle Germany. (not so good now we played ****!)

- hi, I'm ginger and I have more friends than Rob green.

Most of the world cup jokes have been poor to be honest :(

[squizzer86]

we were there...

nearest scotland got to south africa was the holiday brochure :P

lol :D